Fertility awareness for the non-monogamous

It’s pretty standard: most people, including fertility awareness educators, recommend that you are in a committed relationship before using a fertility awareness method (you can learn more about the method here). And here I am, about to explain why this is crap.

Why be on hormones when you don’t have to?

If you are single, you probably are either having intercourse intermittently, or not at all. During this time, some people will stay on hormonal contraceptives, but many will choose to come off of them. If you have a new interest, or even just a fling, there is a good chance you will choose to use a condom, anyway, before you can check for STDs, perhaps decide to be monogamous, and all that jazz. So rather than using condoms and hormonal contraceptives, why not have that knowledge of when you are fertile and know to be extra cautious around that time? Don’t make yourself suffer with unwanted side effects for nothing. You can also get the extra benefits of charting your cycles, even if you aren’t having intercourse.

Stop the worry when you aren’t very invested in someone

Do you feel like worrying for a few weeks that you are pregnant, or would you rather know that you had intercourse at a time you couldn’t get pregnant, used another method on top of that, and that your period is expected on exactly X date? Which situation would you choose? What is the less stressful situation here?

The nose knows

There is evidence that the pill alters someones ability to detect one of the things that may attract us to a mate: a different major histocompatibility complex. Essentially, this is to attract us to mates with different immune systems so that we create offspring with better immune function. This hasn’t been super well studied, but if it is true, think of the implications such as autoimmune problems and allergies we have seen a rise in.

Of course, there are advantages to being in a relationship and using it, just as there are advantages of being single or non monogamous and using it. There is no reason to exclude yourself from the pool of potential users because you are not currently in a monogamous relationship. If you are interested in learning more about the method or if it’s for you, check out the HER fertility program to learn fertility awareness.